Why not?

19 Apr

“We’re heading to Vegas in a couple weeks. Maybe you and [Twin] should just book a flight and come with us.”

The suggestion was so far out there. I can’t go to Vegas. And then it occurred to me – why not?

My thoughts snowballed from contemplating the realities and logistics of booking an impromptu trip to Vegas to considering the general concept of Spontaneity. The idea of “why not?” took on an entirely new meaning and I couldn’t for the life of me answer the question.

Twin explained to me the next day that she’s been feeling the same sense of restlessness I’ve had recently. She spent a semester in Australia and has been missing it desperately lately. Bex is quitting her job in June, bumming around NYC for July, and then leaving in August. She doesn’t know where she’s going or what she’s going to do – but that’s the beauty in it. She’s just going. Frere is graduating from college in three weeks and he has no plans. While that’s a major source of anxiety for him (understandably so), it incites an odd sense of envy within me.

I don’t want to be jobless and I certainly don’t regret my job in any way. I actually really enjoy it and, like I said in my last post, I love my life here a lot. I know I don’t plan to live in Manhattan forever; when this job reaches its peak or when it ceases to hold so much excitement for me, I know I’ll leave and I know there’s a chance I won’t come back. In the meantime, though, why aren’t I doing crazy, spontaneous things like booking a flight to Vegas for a weekend?

As Twin and I discussed this concept of Being Spontaneous, we came up with a whole host of excuses for why it wouldn’t work. No vacation days, work is busy, obligations here in the city, it’s too crazy, we’re too poor. And then we’d say – that’s what weekends are for, work is not life, plans can be changed, nothing’s too crazy, and that’s what credit cards are for. We realized we were almost looking for excuses – and when we were able to rebut them all, the restlessness went full throttle.

I’m not exactly financially secure; living in Manhattan is kind of a trade off for any kind of savings opportunity. But I’m also not entirely broke and I have really good credit, don’t carry a balance, and have a pretty large limit on my card. Money is kind of the only real logistical road block – and I can’t even use that as an excuse.

To clarify: Twin and I are not going to Vegas. That weekend happens to be the one where I have had plans for quite some time to visit Mama Bird and her computer just died so her finances are a bit tied up in a new laptop. I also happen to have plans every single weekend in May.

But what is there stopping me from hitting June or July and dropping everything for a weekend and going to Vegas? Or L.A? Or anywhere else you can fly there and back within a 72-hour period? Even writing about the potentiality of all this is incredibly exciting…which makes it that much clearer to me that this is something I need to turn into a reality.

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5 Responses to “Why not?”

  1. Frere April 20, 2009 at 1:48 am #

    Frere is also having difficulty processing a lot of life, though… so don’t get TOO envious

  2. B April 20, 2009 at 8:32 am #

    I feel the same way now and also did at the end of last semester. LAW SCHOOL FINALS make me unable to make any plans (except study groups… bleh) and feel guilty for having any fun. I feel very restless and trapped.

    Confrere, you will be OK! I wish I could come to graduation. Have fun!!

  3. Mama Bird April 20, 2009 at 8:41 am #

    I wish my laptop hadn’t died and I could be spontaneous with you. I hate being boring. We will do spontaneous things the weekend you come to visit though!

  4. B April 20, 2009 at 12:35 pm #

    Also, it’s about time you posted again. I was getting bored with the rest of the internet.

  5. j April 22, 2009 at 8:53 am #

    Y Vegas? Ick.

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