Ok, I know I’ve been slacking again. But this time I’m not apologizing for it! Even though Mama Bird has been pestering me on a near-daily basis for the past week or so, I honestly just have not had time. Because last week my company announced a huge, industry-changing merger that is incredibly exciting and awesome and makes us double in size and even more prominent industry leaders and totally global and I’d link you to the actual announcements but honestly I work in online media so having this blog exist is risky enough without directly linking our clients to details of my sex life.
Anyway, seriously, I have a TON to update and since I’ve discovered that WordPress lets me schedule posts to upload automatically I can spend a good amount of time tonight writing and then you can have updates several times this week even when I’m busy!
Also, my last post got a whopping four comments – one from this fucking awesome chick who I seriously want to meet and feel sort of creepy saying that but whatever because she probably wants to meet me too, one from Mama Bird, one from a rando who also started following me on Twitter, and one from this dude named Lance Puig.
Most of the time, comments are from friends like Mama Bird, B, or Bex, and sometimes they are from other bloggers which always makes me super happy and excited. Sometimes, my mom comments. That’s never ok. But I’ve moved on. [Heyyy Mom! Call me back?] Sometimes, they are spam. No matter who they are from, if they are though provoking or flattering or particularly exciting, I acknowledge them either via gchat or an email response. I have never gotten a comment with the potential to offend me. Until Lance Puig.
Now, Lance Puig doesn’t know me and I don’t know him. I want to emphasize that his comment, which told me to be sure to always use protection [during sex, of course, since I’m being slutty], has only the potential to offend me. The potential is squashed when I remember he has no idea who I am aside from this blog. And that made me realize that I’ve never, ever, broached the subject of the most important thing to aspiring or current sluts: CONDOMS!
Use them, bitches! Oh my god use them. Seriously. I have never, ever, NOT used them and one time it came off and I wasn’t on the pill and I freaked out until I got my period a couple weeks later. After Lance Puig’s comment, I just felt the need to clarify. I always, always, use protection. And I get tested annually. And if I actually become a bigger whore (seriously I am only on Guy #5, people) I will probably get tested more regularly. And use more than just condoms.
(Also, Lance Puig, part of the point of the last post was Magnum Condoms, so I feel it is fair to assume I use protection.)
(Also, when I googled Lance Puig, his name was like, totally linked to tons of fraud-search suggestions and Google, you kind of freaked me out and made me wonder what kinds of people are reading my blog. No offense, Lance Puig.)