The Joys of Popcorn Dinner

18 Aug

Yesterday, right at noon, my date was cancelled. I didn’t so much care about the guy, who I’d yet to meet, but more about the fact that now, my Mental Plan was all wrong. I’d straightened my hair, you see, and put on a cute-but-comfortable sundress in a really pretty color. These are big accomplishments when it’s 75 degrees and gorgeous outside, but still 90 and humid in your apartment.

But there it was. The date was cancelled and I was ready to do something after work. The thing is, I’d already been feeling somewhat … solitarily inclined. (Does that even make sense as a statement? It does to me, so go with it.) But my Mental Plan was telling me to make plans to do something with someone.

So there that was. The Epic Battle of Solitary Inclination vs. Mental Plan. Well let me just tell you, that Solitary Inclination is a force to be reckoned with. My Mental Plan was immediately derailed and set on an entirely new track when Fandango told me that Crazy Stupid Love was playing at the theater three blocks from my apartment. At 7:30. The exact time of my now-cancelled-date.

Basically, going to the movies is like taking yourself on this super chill date. Sure, you buy your own ticket and popcorn costs like $943.76 PER KERNEL, but that’s part of the joy! You’re the one who decided to take yourself out, so you get to treat yourself to some fucking expensive starches if you so desire.
I’d been wanting to go see Crazy Stupid Love pretty much since the first preview featured Ryan Gosling’s obviously-photoshopped abs. Every time I considered it, though, I had plans or it was sunny or I had some way better reason to drop $9,4300.76 other than paying for ten popcorn kernels.

And now I get to sing the praises of solo-movie-going, or as I like to call it, Popcorn Dinner.

Here’s the thing about going to the movies alone. It’s the best thing in the entire world but also? Totally underrated. Here’s why:

The Best Parts of Popcorn Dinner

  • You get to choose your seat. No one to tell if it’s too close or too far away or not-in-the-center-enough.
  • You get to choose your snacks. Want that giant blue Icee? Gulp it down. Personally, tonight I opted for a giant (well, medium, but that’s giant for one person) heavily-buttered popcorn and a diet coke. I even over-buttered the popcorn, which made it kind of inedible, but guess what? I ate it anyway. No one was there to tell me not to!
  • You get to react to the movie however you want to. Laughing at the wrong time? Crying when it shouldn’t be that emotional? Rolling your eyes at the inanity of the entire movie? Never you mind – you’re seeing the movie solo!
  • (OMG I totally didn’t know “inanity” was a real word!) (Is it?)

After this mystery-gent cancelled our date – which was already a reschedule of the original date – a mere 7.5 hours prior to the supposed meeting, I could think of nothing that would make me happier than taking myself on a date where the girl gets the guy and the guy gets the girl and everything’s tied up in a neat little artificial bow.

And you know what? I was right! That is the real joy of Popcorn Dinner.


3 Responses to “The Joys of Popcorn Dinner”

  1. Drea August 18, 2011 at 3:39 pm #

    Yes, this. Unfortunately, taking yourself on a date is the first thing to go when you get really busy. That sucks.

  2. hijabeng August 18, 2011 at 4:46 pm #

    This post was great. I really want to see that movie, too. The first movie I ever took myself out to see was Black Swan. Scared myself to death (I hate tense movies). Never again. From now on, fluffy rom-coms all the way. With curly fries.


  1. Chronicles of the Unimpressive Gents « Guide to Being Awesome - August 25, 2011

    […] I mentioned that a date had cancelled on me. Today, I wish to enlighten you further on this particular topic. […]

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